Escape

Hey Abyss,


Today was one of the first days over the last month that I have had time to myself. Clearly.

I have been all over the map both figuratively and literally lately and haven't had a good chunk of time to sit down and write something cohesive. Here I sit, drinking a smoothie and listing to Alabama Shakes (pun intended), and I am going to try and stay focussed enough to give a full report of what I has happened lately.

First things first, it needs to be Spring. I am tired of Winter. I find myself perpetually in long underwear and 3 layers of clothing. And frankly, there is only so many times I can wear the same sweater before I feel like cartoon and not a young man who has invested in his wardrobe.

From March 16th to the 22nd my class and I were in Toronto filming a short that was directed by Paul Gross, it was a stellar project for me. I was the "lead" character in the film which was a challenge for me in many ways: It was great to feel what it is like to hold a film, to constantly be on screen and how to develop an arch throughout the shoot. It was something that I haven't had the opportunity to do in any of the shows here at the school so it was great to finally feel that. Paul was a great director for me and had a very clear idea of what he wanted from me and the character which helped me to solidify my own ideas of who the character was. I was on set for about 36 hours out of the 3 days we were shooting and it wasn't really until the final day of shooting that I felt back at home on set and felt confident in what I was doing. Although it hasn't been THAT long since I was on a film set it was a different vibe, as each one is. The crew was fantastic and were all really great people who genuinely wanted to create something meaningful. Everyone was positive and seemed to be enjoying their job. All of the crew were professional and had worked with Paul on one occasion or another, so it really allowed us as a class to focus on our process and how to adjust to this "new medium".

I struggled the most with the idea of trusting that my work was coming through on camera. There were moments where Paul would get frustrated because it seemed like I couldn't follow simple directions like: "slow down and then when you get to the pole run across the street." When what was happening in my mind was that I had become so preoccupied with staying true to the character that I would hear the direction but then not be able to execute it. It's seems simple. and it is once I started trusting that my work was shining through. Eventually on the third day of filming, and one of the final shots of the day I found a connection with the camera, suddenly we were in sync and I discovered the rush that comes from playing with the camera. I didn't have to worry about anything anymore I just lived, as the character, and was aware of the camera. Instead of ignoring it or being scared of it.

Paul is such an awesome resource and an extremely generous man, who just made the whole experience that much more incredible. To know how much respect he has for the art and the people involved with crafting it was really inspiring. Here is a man that is one of Canada's darlings who has had a long and lucrative career still excited about what he does and has positive and insightful stories.   I really appreciated him taking the time that he did to prepare me for the industry and inform me of my habits and how to get them under wraps so I can push through and get what I want. After we wrapped, Paul took us to see what goes into the editing process and I was blown away by the amount of work that is required in post production. It, again, humbled me and made me realize how small my part is in the birth of a film. Looking back, I gained even more respect for all the aspects and energies that go into making a film, even a 15 minute one.

The few nights that I had to myself in Toronto, I got such a pleasure out of walking around the streets and imagining myself there in a few months. As I have said, I certainly don't want to rush my last few weeks here at the school, but at the same time I am ready to jump head first into the industry and never look back. I am anxious to meet new people and hear about other things besides the school and the drama within each class, including my own. I am tired of popularity contests and having to always get the right answer. I am tired of competing. Whether it is in my mind or not, I am exhausted with trying to give the most intellectual answers, and be the most clever person in the room all the time. I am tired of there constantly being a double edged sword; some people can do whatever they want, say whatever they want, but as soon as I do it's too far. I want to be separate from the unit that is my class. I want freedom, I want a life of my own. Every time I have been in Toronto over the last year I have gotten so excited about the possibilities that await me there.

This is not to say that I am not proud of my classmates, I am. Watching them on camera filled me with pride. Everyone in my class is talented, thats never been a question, but it is difficult to be surrounded by someone who might like you one day and have no patience for you the next. I feel like I am in a constant state of adaptation and I just want to be me, in all my forms, not just the ones that accommodate others. I am anxious to get out, but at the same time know that once I leave I will be wanting the security of these walls back. The schedule, although intense, is comforting. The student loans, although accumulating, make life easy.

This week we started our individual rehearsals for the New Words Festival, our class is divided and we work on the plays written by the 2 graduating playwrights. I am in The Circle, written by Geoffrey Brown and is being directed by Ann-Marie Kerr. I have been wanting to work with Ann-Marie for some time now, as she lives in Halifax and is married to Anthony Black, who in my opinion is one of the strongest artists in the maritimes. Rehearsal has been going wonderfully, Ann-Marie is so energetic and excited about the possibilities of this project and her positivity resonates with all of us in the cast. She makes me feel comfortable and able to just try things, rather than fitting into a box or getting things right. I have a lot of confidence that the piece is going to really mess with peoples expectations of both Geoff, as a writer, and the cast. I am really excited to cap my education off with a stellar show and well developed character and I know that Ann-Marie is leading us down that path.

I have made a lot of discoveries over the last few months and will hopefully have more time to chronicle them more regularly in the next few. I have singed with Lorraine Wells & Company in Toronto and both her and I are anxious to get my career in gear. I am working hard to get myself to the city as soon as possible post graduation, and that is where my journey will continue.

I am ready to escape.

Night Abyss


P.S. If you missed Bone Deep at the Atlantic Film Festival or have yet to see it at all, you can hop over to CBC and see the performance which garnered me an ACTRA Maritime Award nomination for Best Actor. I am extremely proud of this film and hope that you enjoy it.

http://www.cbc.ca/download/

This film was recently accepted into the NSI Online Short Film Festival, and who knows what will happen next!

It's Morphing Time.

Hey,

These last few weeks have been insane with getting Lion in the Streets up, so I apologize for the lack of inner thoughts from me lately.

Not to worry, you will get your fill right now!

We had our preview tonight and it went well, considering how nervous I was. I am really looking forward to the run this week, I feel like my classmates and I have really risen to the challenge of this piece and are doing phenomenal work. I'm really proud of the show. I find the longer I spend with something, a play, a character, the more love I feel towards it. This play is a really hard one to love because of all the atrocity, but I have grown really fond of it. Ravi has been excellent to work with, his young energy has been really refreshing in the room. He has really made this show work visually, his confidence in his ideas really allowed us to play, which I, personally, don't feel we have had the opportunity to do in a show yet.  I really wouldn't have wanted this process to be anything than what it was. It has been an amazing opportunity to work with Ravi, and I hope it isn't the last time.

Starting out this year, I was really aiming to open myself up to processes and just be calm. I am discovering success in both of theses avenues. It has been such a relief to stop worrying about things I cannot control, of course there are going to be things that bother me, or irritate me. But, overall it's just been so relaxing to leave school at school and come home and live my life for me. Before, I found myself needing to do all this meaningless research and putting my energy into stressing about class drama instead of actually working and focusing on what was needed at that time. This year, I come home and I work for a bit and then I relax and enjoy. It seems simple but it has given me so much freedom. I will always have control issues, I am an Aries, but that doesn't mean that I can't let go of the things that I really have no say in. And accepting that has been a huge step for me.

I feel really happy and healthy this year, I promised that I would take care of myself Mind, Body, Spirit and I have been! It has been so great to simple focus on those things, when you take care of yourself: eating well, exercising regularly, etc. you feel the benefits quickly, seriously. It has feed my work and made me relax in a lot of departments. As cheesy as it sounds, I am becoming the person I have wanted to be for the last 2 years. And I cannot think of a better time to come into my own. This year is already blazing by and I can honestly say I am only worried about one thing, and that is what happens after.

Over the last few weeks, I have been asked, "So...what are the plans after you graduate? "This is a pretty normal question, but the problem is I seriously don't have an answer. I have no sweet clue what is happening after I graduate. There are obviously things that I am interested in and projects I would love to be a part of, but once this year ends I have to uproot myself from Montreal and pick where I take my stuff. It is daunting. I'm aware that I can only take it one day at a time and just keep sending out my antenna for possible opportunities, but it is the one thing that is regularly on my mind and what truly worries me most. In the end, all I can do is good work,  and eventually someone will take notice. What's encouraging is that I am good at something that I feel passionate about, and all of the other students that graduate this year are in the same boat "What happens after?"

So, at least I am not alone.

Speaking of not being alone, if you have live/know anyone who lives in Montreal, please spread the word about the show. You can get all the details from the link above. The more people we have at our performances the better an experience this year will be. I am so excited to see how the run goes and what things will change and grow. This year is shaping up wonderfully. I am blessed.

In recent news, I was nominated for Best Actor in a Short Film at the ACTRA awards a few weeks ago, I felt so honoured to be up against some veterans in the industry and that people thought highly enough of my performance in Bone Deep to nominate me. It would have been nice to win, but losing so someone who inspires you isn't really a loss. In my eyes, it was an honour, and I still have many more opportunities to show my skills ahead of me.

Bone Deep is premiering on CBC November 16th, and will be uploaded to iTunes to rent or purchase later that day!

All the Wrong Reason's played in Montreal last week and I was so upset that I had to miss it, but tech week for the show was extremely demanding (time-wise). It is so wonderful that it's getting attention, it is truly deserving of it. Also, if you missed the opportunity to see Blackbird, my previous film, you can now buy it on iTunes by clicking here: http://blackbirdthefilm.com/screenings/

If you live in Parrsboro, Nova Scotia you can see Blackbird on the big screen as part of the Parrsboro Film Festival this weekend!

That is all for now,

Night Abyss.

Tub Dreaming - A Return

Hey Abyss,

Look, I know its been a while buddy but I have concluded that there is really no point in my writing about my progress in school. It would get repetitive and boring, and on a side note the training at NTS is one that cannot described. So I come to you with news of my return.

I am going to be making weekly entry's now that, one, I have time due to the ending of school for the summer, and, two, I am heading back to Halifax for job hunting! So lets dive in:

Today is my 4th day in my empty apartment. The only things to keep me busy are my cats, a computer with limited internet connection and a newly polished off 4kg container of peanut butter. Sounds like a ballin' time eh? I have been sleeping in my bathtub because my bed has been moved to my new apartment, that is about a half hour away, and I have slowly been packing my ONE bag with the essentials that I think I am going to need for 4 months.

This past week has been an eventful one full of much drama and learning. I will start off with my Monday of last week which started with me falling down Mount Royal and having my hand crushed and splitting my pinkie open. After a trip to the emergency room, with help from a man I had just met that night, I was back in my apartment with a stitched hand and a now lost iPod. Needless to say, I have learned to not drink 6 litres of Heineken and go rock climbing after a Canadian Solider, the guy who helped me, has told me not to.

My hand was pretty swollen earlier this week and so I could do nothing for myself, and I mean nothing.

Picture personal things, yeah those I couldn't do either.

So I needed a lot of help and was surprised by the amount of people who called and offered to help my in any way they could. Except with the personal things.

On Wednesday two of my friends helped me move all my furniture over to one of the three apartments I am currently paying for.

A quote : "You always know who your friends are when you see who shows up after you ask for help moving." Jesse LaVercombe.

I was happy to get that all done in less then two hours, but had forgotten that now I had nothing in my apartment which has made for, as mentioned earlier, a grand 'ol time.

Let's just say I think that my cats and I know each other really well now.

My hand has slowly been healing and if you follow my Twitter or Facebook you can see the damage as of yesterday. It reminds me of Frankenstein.

Always an attractive feature to have when appealing to women.

I am leaving for home on wednesday night of this week coming and am stoked to see my family again, although my dear mother laughed at me when I called her and told her what happened on the mountain. It will be nice to have a home cooked meal, or at least a free trip to MacDonalds. I am excited to see all my friends and catch up with people who I have missed for the 8 months I have been here. And most importantly getting some more acting work!

I am praying, for my student loan sake, that this summer will be lucrative and I can make some money and get a decent amount of coverage again. I feel so out of the loop with my city and I am anxious to get back and start annoying people with my public appearances.

I don't want to prattle on for too long but hopefully this has answered the question as to why I have not been writing. And if you have any other questions for me put them in the comment box below.

Also Check out my IMDB, Twitter and Facebook.

Peace Abyss.

I am someone

Hey,

So good news, as of this Wednesday coming I am finally part of ACTRA. This accomplishment is something that I have been trying to achieve since I started this blog, about 8 months ago. I am proud to say I am finally a member of the organization that enables me to be part of professional film/TV projects and get adequate payment!

This probably means nothing to you reading this, but for me it is a big deal and I am stoked to have it.

I auditioned for Mick Garris' new feature film last week and it was probably the hardest audition I have had to do, including NTS....

I don't feel like I did my best and all I can really do is wait to see what happens. I am hoping  for a callback but I don't see that happening due to the fact that the start filming on the 20th...

Alas, the life of an actor. I love it.

I am currently at my Joe job right now doing nothing because it is slower than molasses going uphill in winter, an expression that my grandfather would be proud of me using. What up Gramp?

I am moving back into my friends apartment  ASAP, I told my landlord this information today. She will probably forget seeing as even after 9 months she still doesn't know my name... as referenced before; quite like an ork.

Anyway I have to do some training... night abyss

ACTRA > Equity..

Abyss,

Well don't we have a situation. Due to my recent persistance about whether I have garnered any union status I have discovered something rather positive...

First off, when I took this contract that I am currently on I assumed that i would be getting at least one credit towards Equity. I found out today that this would have been the case had it been expressed when the contract was signed.. needless to say it was not due to my naivety. I will have to be more aware next time, but do not despair for since I was cast in Blackbird I have been given my ACTRA status! With this I feel like I am no longer just some kid doing acting for fun.

I am now of legitimate status and can be considered for bigger things :) While still maintaining my availablity to partake in community theatre.

So needless to say I am stoked beyond reason.

Tomorrow is the end of our 5th week on tour and then we move into the last phase of the tour. 2 more weeks then sadly we are done. Time has moved so quickly, I cannot get over how fast it has gone. I am grateful for every minute.


I am still waiting to hear from NTS and am looking forward to start filming. I am going to attempt to get a little bit more in shape before the shoot, just to improve my physical presence on screen (haha).

That is kind of it for now, haven't heard from any new auditions.. but at this point I don't need anything till after the film is done.

I will update accordingly.

Night Abyss

I Now Understand Hiatus

Abyss,

I know this seems to be a reoccurring situation, but I do apologize for the lack of posts. It has been over a month since my last entry and quite a bit has happened. I really want to make one of my New Year Resolutions to post at least weekly, similar to what I stated earlier in these posts. Except I will actually follow through.

I discovered that I can totally post from my iPhone, yet another convenience. So with this new found information I can guarantee at least a post a week. My life may not be that exciting but hopefully you find enjoyment out of my obscene ramblings. Anyway, let's get down to business!

School for winter break ended last Thursday and I miss it already, the term went by quicker than expected and I learned so much. Tue teachers are all stellar human beings and I wish I could just read biographies on all of them. They seem to have been through so many experiences in their lives. Alas, I do not have this option to read about them, instead I have a giant list of plays that needs to be read before January 3rd.

I have made a point to get all my application things done before I head back to school. So that is presently what I am working on. Majority of the schools I am applying to are in Toronto and it is costing me a pretty penny to just apply, this doesn't include the airfare and possible audition fees as well. It is going to probably end up costing me as much as my first term tuition! but I need education, so it will hopefully be worth it if I actually get accepted.

I was recently involved with a couple of things; over the weekend I was in a short film that will continue filming in January as well as a work shop that is in preparation for a provincial tour, I have yet to find out if I will be cast in the tour solely due to the fact that they are casting the female lead(opposite me) from Toronto. So the whole workshop cast is just waiting to hear from the director as to whether will will be going on tour. I would obviously jump at the opportunity to tour and it would give me a credit towards my equity status, which of course is also gladly accepted. I am still working my butt of to get my Equity/ACTRA status before I head off to Toronto.

Also in the works is a show I putting together, Monster by Daniel MacIvor. I have recently obtained his one man show and emailed him about receiving the rights to it so that I can perform it this summer in my hometown and save the money for school so I can avoid student loans as much as possible. I have to unfortunately wait for a response from him until I can really put my plan into action, but I am hoping he will respond soon enough.

That is essentially it in my life at the moment. I am just about to leave for work and will talk to you tomorrow!

Night Abyss