I have spent the last 5 days relaxing and
reflecting.
A much needed activity.
I was on the bus yesterday and the only other
passenger was an elderly woman. I had put my money in the fare counter and
asked if she would corroborate my story (that I paid) if the driver came back
and was suspicious. She said she would and I asked her about her day. In a
matter of 10 minutes she had told me about her childhood travelling the coast
of Oregon and how much her friends had became her family in recent years after
her parents died. She embodied happiness for me. Here she was simply riding the
bus to see where it would take her. She had her book, time and was ready for an
adventure. It made me step back and think about the experiences I'm missing out
on by rushing around not being present.
I have had this wonderful opportunity presented to
me, and although I am having the time of my life and meeting remarkable people,
I find myself thinking about what needs to happen when this dream sequence
ends: What is the next phase of my career? Where is my next paycheque coming
from? Who do I need to meet next? Granted, these are all important questions
for an actor to ask, but not as important as focusing on what is in front of
me.
When my class was working with Joe Ziegler, on A
Midsummer Night's Dream, I had booked a short film, Bone
Deep, back in Halifax while playing Theseus in the show. Joe
generously said I could leave to shoot the film that weekend, but then the next
day when we were working my scenes I was completely unprepared due to my
preoccupation with the film. My work in the show suffered and Joe felt taken
advantage of. After all was said and done he said this to me, "Do your
best with what you have right now. Then when that is over, you can move onto
the next thing." As it was before, it now has to become my mantra
again.
A few days ago I went to the beach and as soon as
my feet hit the water my worries just slid off of me. I forget how soul
cleansing it is. Perhaps it is the maritimer in me, but nothing eases my
tensions more than the ocean. While I was treading water I thought about how
simple my life could be if I just let go of all these trivial agendas. Being
in that water, not only showed me how out of shape I am, but also how glorious
it is to just be here, now.
The people that I've caught up with are all at similar
points in their life; feeling bogged down about their career paths or the need to keep up with the Jones'. If I'm learning anything lately it's that
everyone has to forge their own paths. Trying to compare oneself with someone
else is useless and ultimately thieving the joy from ones life.
"Gratitude is the antidote to misery." - Robin Sharma
I have been working on incorporating this quote
into all facets of my life and it has only brought positive experiences to me.
Every person I have met and conversed with over the last
few weeks has been nothing short of generous and insightful. The amount of
people who have met me with generosity simply because I have taken the time to
be real with them, listen to them speak about their lives and offer my advice, is huge. There is so much more to generosity than monetary gain, and my soul
feels warmer because of it.
If
life is a series of experiences rather than number of years on the Earth,
I really want to give every person and opportunity the time they deserve. I
watched a wonderful Ted Talk the other night that spoke about how we need to
focus more on our relationships and the legacy we are leaving behind
rather than all of the superficial things that pollute our day-to-day lives.
I
couldn't agree more.
W.
W.
1 comment:
I loved this post - and your writing. I have been in a very similar head space for a while, and I appreciate your take on it and the reminder to live in the moment! Thank you!
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